April Fools

A man is pulling backwards out of a parking spot on campus. He slows as he pulls close to another car parked across the road, but I see he will make it, so I wave to him to keep pulling back.

He does, and bumps the car with a nice solid "Crack".

The man gets out and looks at the car. Then looks at me.

"Good hit." I say, nodding my head. "Solid."

"What the..." he says, "You waved me on. You said there was room."

"Yeah." I agree. "I thought you were trying to hit that car. I was just helping."

"What? Why would I be trying to hit another car? Are you an idiot?" he screams.

"April Fools!" I say.

He tilts his head to the side in stunned confusion, and I giggle at my successful prank.

Another guy is walking by. "That's not a funny prank," he judges, opinion unbidden.

"Oh, come on," I say, "Sure it is."

"No." he says. "It's mean. "

I don't like to be mean. My mom always said that I have a deeply engrained sense of fair play and justice. This is the main reason that I was always my parents' favourite child. For a second, I start to doubt myself. Is this mean? Maybe I've gone too far. Have I had too much fun?

"April Fools!" the passerby yells. "It was very funny! An absolute poisson d'Avril."

"Hey!" says the man from the car. "Look at the dent I put in this car. This is no harmless joke. This is going to cost me some serious money!"

The passerby is taken aback. I doubt that he has my same qualms about justice and parental approval, but he doesn't seem to like someone yelling at him. "No need to yell..." he mumbles.

"Well," I say, my sense of fair-play at conflict with my innate cheapness, "I'm feeling a bit responsible now. I can help pay for the damage."

"It's going to be expensive," he says, pointing at the car. "That's a Tesla."

I feel myself tearing up. The passerby is tearing up, too. This really is an April Fools' joke gone wrong. Like Google's mic drop joke.

I sniffle.

"April Fools!" the man yells with a huge smile. He pulls out a knife and scratches "April Fools!" into the door of the Tesla above the dent. "All good."

We three become the best of friends and start up a popular boy band. A real April Fools' Day success story.