Parallel professional

Are there professional parallel parkers?

I pull into the apartment parking lot after bringing Lisa home from pottery.

Someone is screwing around, headlights on, trying to pull into the last perpendicular spot.

There is one parallel spot left.

Dimming my lights, as you do when maneuvering around other cars, I pull a tight 3-point turn, so I can park facing out of the parking lot, and then execute the perfect parallel park. One quick stroke, eight centimeters from the curb, dead middle of the space.

Perfect!

"Lisa!" I say, "You've just witnessed perfection."

"What, Daddy?"

"Perfection!" I repeat. No more explicative, but the satisfied confidence with which I repeat the word relieves Lisa of all doubt about the singularity of the event. She is at peace.

As I get out of the car, I cannot see the face of the guy still screwing around trying to get his car into the perpendicular spot, but his jealous admiration manifests palpably.

I look around to see if there are security cameras, that I might submit a video of the park to the professional parallel parkers' association for prizes or honorary membership.

Is there such an association? Screw membership. I could be the president.

"There are prizes for parking like that." I tell Lisa.

If there aren't, there should be.

"Daddy," Lisa asks, as we walk into the apartment, "Do you think you teach me how to park when I'm old enough?"

I think I might just do that.