I leave Prague tomorrow. I turn off the lights, pull down the blind, and say goodbye to my office.

As I take the number 20 tram to Andel for the last time, and then the metro home to Jinonice for the last time, I am contemplative. I go up the stairs to my apartment, and start packing.

I hear a knock on my door. "Who is it?" I call out.

"Me." I hear God say into my ear.

"Come in." I yell, knowing that He can unlock the door Himself.

"I'm in here," He says, walking out of my kitchen with a tea-pot in his hand.

"It's good that you came," I said, "I was about to go down to see You."

"I know. But I know you are busy getting ready to leave, so I thought I would save you some time." Then gesturing to a chair, "Tea?"

"That's very thoughtful, of You. I mean coming here. But yes, I would like some tea."

"I'd do the same for an atheist." he quips a variation of a classic old line of Austin Bigsby. He pours out some tea. "In fact, I'll do you one better. I don't want to take up any of your time, so I'll stop it while we have a little chat."

"Stop time?"

"Uh-hup." he gestures at a clock that is suddenly on the wall, its second-hand conspicuously still.

I go look out the window. There are a couple of philosophy students posed outside the building with cigarettes. They seem not to be moving, but I can't tell from this far away. Looking about a bit more, I see a pigeon stopped in mid-flight, as if in a photograph. I turn back to him, "I thought you didn't like using your powers like that."

"This isn't invasive. It won't bother anyone. Sometimes I do it when two things I want to watch are on at the same time."

"You could just get a VCR," I suggest.  

"Yeah, Satan would love that." He has a fairly complicated set of rules about things like this that I have a little trouble understanding. But it isn't really for me to understand.

"Say," the question suddenly strikes me. "Have you every been in the St. Miklas Church?"

"Of course. It's my house, after all." he smiles.

"You have a lot of houses in Prague, then."

"Yeah. That's why I like it so much here." Then he gives me a sly smile. "That and all the good looking ladies."

This is typical guy talk, of course, but it makes me uncomfortable. God is not your typical guy. You wouldn't expect your dad to make comments like that, and you certainly wouldn't expect it from your creator. I pretend I didn't hear it.

"I haven't been in it. I've been working in the attached monastery for the last year, and have never gone in the Church."

"I could take you there."

"No, thanks. It gives me something to come back for."

We talk about the weather and Prague and wrestling (he loves it) and movies and such for what seems like hours. But time doesn't move. I am running out of things to say ( I have all sorts of questions, but I've heard "You aren't supposed to know that." or "That'll be revealed in time." or the like enough to know that they won't be answered.)

"So." I say, "Was there anything in particular you wanted to talk about?"

"Just what you wanted to talk about. I wanted to say how its been nice having you live upstairs, and that I'll be sorry to see you go?"

I am flattered. I feel the same way about Him, of course, but that is only to be expected. There is only one of Him, and it isn't everyone who gets the opportunity to borrow eggs from Him.

"Wow, God." I say, thanks. "It has been a singular experience meeting you, one that I will never forget."

"The pleasure's been mine. I got something for you." He hands me a small black box.

"You shouldn't have." I say. "What is it?"

"Three wishes." He says.

"Really?"

"No. I'm not a genie," he smiles. "Besides, you know I don't like doing things like that. It's Czech made crystal."

"Thank-you."

"Well then. I guess I'll get going. Good luck, and keep in touch."

"Of course." I say. "Oh, do you use e-mail."

He shakes His head. Then puts His hands together slowly, palm to palm, with an ironic smile.

"Oh yeah." I say. "You answer that, eh?"

"Usually. If you don't get me, press #9."

"Really?"

"No. I'm joking. I'll answer. Not always as you expect it, but I'll answer."

"Ok. Goodbye then."

"Be blessed."