The mice in my house seem to figured out how to get at a hunk of inside a hard plastic click-locking container, INSIDE the FRIDGE!

"No, no." he says. "Beep is no drinking."

"I'm not a woman," I say, "I can't use an umbrella when it isn't raining."

Walking to the library to return some books, I see a sign posted outside a building advertising 'milk pilates'.

"I wish I had as many friends as you." I say. Teasing her back. "What is his name?" I ask, nodding my head back at the construction worker.

"Well, that isn't my fault, is it? If you had been happy, I wouldn't have to pretend."

"Well, 'ow about 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Nut'?"

"When you see someone looking at the wet patch on my belly, Lisa," I remind her,"I want a loud and sincere sounding 'Sorry for spilling that juice on you, Daddy.' "